Friday, March 11, 2022

Bruxy Cavey and The Meeting House sexual abuse scandal: Update from the March 10 town hall

 

On March 9 Anabaptist World published my story about the resignation of The Meeting House senior pastor Bruxy Cavey after a report found he had abused his power in engaging in a sexual relationship with a woman who came to him for counseling in 2011. A town hall was held March 8 by the church to address the situation.

A second town hall was hurriedly called on March 10 to answer some of the many questions that had come in since the first town hall; a report from that meeting is below.  

The Meeting House is a large Anabaptist congregation with a reported 5,000 people meeting at 20 sites in Ontario. It is part of the Be In Christ denomination.

Some of the material below has been incorporated into an update in my Anabaptist World article. 

At a town hall meeting held online on March 10, leaders from The Meeting House acknowledged they could have done a better job of assisting the victim of former senior pastor Bruxy Cavey during the investigation into her allegations, and that the church has a workplace culture that has fostered sexual misconduct over the years.

The event, facilitated by executive chair Maggie John and church leaders Nour Aziz, Yohan Mahimwala and Jennifer Hryniw, was held to deal with the hundreds of questions that had come into the church since the announcement of Cavey’s resignation on March 8. 

The event was attended by over 1,200 people. 

The town hall began with a statement from the victim, who goes by the name “Hagar.” 

In her statement, “Hagar” reiterated her critique that the findings of the independent investigation didn’t go far enough. 

As a result, some people still described it as an affair instead of what it was, “Hagar” said: clergy sexual abuse. 

“This began during a pastoral counselling relationship,” she said in the statement. 

“I was in crisis and trusted him, and I did not nor could I consent to a sexual relationship with him. This was not for me an extramarital relationship or affair. It was a devastating twisting of pastoral care into sexual abuse.” 

(Her full statement is available on her new website.) 

During the town hall, which was led by executive chair Maggie John and church leaders Nour Aziz, Yohan Mahimwala and Jennifer Hryniw, they said while they respected “Hagar’s” perspective, they agreed to stick with the language of the investigator’s report. 

There was “no doubt in anyone’s mind it was an abuse of power,” they said. 

In answers to questions from members, they said “Hagar” was not asked to sign a non-disclosure agreement, although Cavey was asked to refrain from making any public comments until the investigation was complete. 

He published a post titled “My Confession” on his blog after the first town hall meeting. 

When asked why Cavey wasn’t fired, they said the church felt resigning would give Cavey a “chance to take some responsibility. We felt it was the loving thing to do, even if it was the difficult thing to do.” 

A question was raised about when the abuse happened. No answer was given, but it “lasted a number of years and ended a few years ago,” they said. 

Nobody on staff or in leadership knew about it, they emphasized. 

They said the church continues to stand with Cavey’s wife, Nina, and their three daughters. 

Cavey’s content has been removed from the church’s website out of respect for “Hagar,” they said, adding it has been placed into an archive and could be brought back in the future. 

When asked if they would share the full investigator’s report, they said transparency was an important a value but they wanted “responsible transparency.” 

They would not share it “out of respect” for “Hagar,” they said. 

Near the end of the town hall it was suggested there “seems to be a clear workplace problem at The Meeting Place considering number of occurrences of sexual sin over the years.” 

What, said the questioner, will be done to prevent it in the future? 

They acknowledged sexual misconduct or abuse had happened at the church in the past, adding “we do have a problem . . . things have happened repeatedly.” 

They agreed they want to find a way to make people feel safe at the church and would examine the culture of The Meeting Place “and address it.” 

Just discussing it and moving on was not an option, they said, adding “there’s a lot more learning to do.”

No comments:

Post a Comment